When I notice my energy pouring away, that’s the point where I realise I need to get out of the process.

I realised this a long time ago. I’m simply not good at putting together the systems and processes of a new product.

I like the creative parts, the bit where I come up with the idea, the bits where I can speak to a group or network an idea.

We all have different skills and we can all use them in different ways. The trick is bringing all those people together into a project in different ways that create a pay off.

In our industry people often talk about having a “passion”. And this is fine. But you also need to make sure you can earn a living from that passion.

There is a mistake people make in our industry in following a passion. Let me give you an example…

If you have a passion about yoga and you want others to experience the benefits you have experienced from yoga, you don’t have to become a teacher and try to market your own yoga classes.

There are different ways to earn a living from yoga. For example, your natural gift might be marketing, so team up with a yoga instructor who doesn’t like marketing and show them how to reach more people.

You may also be someone who can create a product that hones in on a specific pain point for people who would benefit from yoga. So, help a teacher create a product.

My own passion is helping people have a better experience of life and while I can, and still occasionally do, mentor or coach, my real passion is elsewhere.

There are already a multitude of amazing teachers, speakers and writers, but where our industry needs the support is in the marketing and PR professionals who can help that message reach the market.

My own passion these days is creating joint ventures for clients – knitting together two people with passions so they can work or market together. Plus we have a great platform to help launch those ventures.

Think about your passion… is it really in the way you are doing what you are doing?

You’ll know by how much energy you have for your work. If it flows and you feel you are thriving, you have it right. If energy feels stuck, something isn’t right – you may be in the right niche, but in the wrong role in that niche.

Good wishes
Neil

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Two guiding principles I go by are:
1.    Know my purpose
2.    Remove obstacles and things that don’t work

Since childhood we’ve been told what to do by our parents, teachers and religions. At work we were told what time to arrive and what time we could leave.

Our peers influence us and so does the TV. And under the weight of all this influence, I suspect that many of us have hardly given much thought to what we really want.

Sometimes I think it’s a bit like we’ve all been hypnotised and just don’t have the brain space to think, so we do what’s being strongly suggested to us.

Our mind reacts to suggestions, and from those suggestion emotions can rise: be they love, anger, joy or hate.

People who succeed on their paths are the people who have learned to control their minds and handle the suggestibility more effectively than others. They have learned to respond only to what is good for them and ignore what is not so good.

Probably one of the biggest influence on our minds is the TV and media. Through news broadcasts we can be manipulated into feeling angry or fearful of other races, cultures and religions and ignore the fact that we’re all human beings and our spiritual priority – above all else – is probably to ensure co-operation and avoid domination.

Advertising is incredibly suggestive. When I was trying to lose weight, I found that whenever I sat down in front of the TV I wanted to eat. Then I realized that a large number of the adverts were food adverts and that after they came on I wanted food.

By knowing my purpose, it allowed me to see the manipulation of the TV. The choice then was, do I watch TV or am I mentally strong enough to self-manage my stomach?

Try following my two guiding principles:
Know my purpose
Remove obstacles and things that don’t work

Lotsa Love
Neil

p.s. If you need more help try our Life Purpose Programme – www.communitysoul.co.uk/lifepurpose.htm

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And while you’re here, leave a comment below and let me know what your guiding principles are.

Here is a list of the 10 most influential people in my business. It\’s not in any particular order – and to be honest I could have added a few more had time permitted… who are your top 10?

1. Jo (my wife) – she can take an idea and simplify it, make a system and process for it and make it function

2. My dad – He\’s always supportive, throws in an idea or two and is an expert on time management and project planning

3. Dr. William Bloom – I know William thinks things through in detail like a teacher. He\’s got integrity and he cares about how something affects people and the environment. When I\’m making a big decision, I\’ll often type out an email to William and ask his opinion. I almost never send the emails, because I can hear him answering as I type the questions – so I guess his response and that helps me.

4. Sir Richard Branson – I love that he\’ll go into an industry where customers are not being treated well, raise a pirate flag against the industry big hitters and start taking the customer they mistreated. The best bit of advice Richard Branson ever gave me was: always work out the downside as well as the upside before you jump into a new venture.

5. Roger Hamilton – his book, Your Life Your Legacy is outstanding. His book is excellent if you want to work out how to leverage your value in the world through your work. A must read for every entrepreneur, in my view.

6. Nelson Mandela – he showed business skills in his campaign to free Africa-  vision, skill and persistence and the ability to adapt to circumstance.

7. Bernadette Doyle – watching what she does – both as our mentor, and because we work closely with her behind the scenes of her business – has taught me it\’s not over until you say it is. Having what you want is about your intent to complete what you start. Through a mastermind group Bernadette also led us to make one of our best ever business decisions.

8. Yanik Silver – The guy is just an outstanding copywriting genius… but more than that, he taught me about how to make people go “Wow” on delivery. He delivers some of the best business products that justify the amazing copy he writes to market them. I remember the first time I read his marketing copy I wanted what he was offering before I was half-way through his copy. I bought it and then the box with all the stuff arrived… manuals, dvds, booklets, cd\’s – more than I would ever need or could have wished for.

9. Lisa Turner – Lisa runs a successful business and laughs more than any other person I know. She is an amazing person to work with and an amazing teacher. She helped me dissolve energy that stops me from being all I can be and opened me up to new possibilities.

10. Karen Knowler – She has her business niche down to an art form. She\’s so practical, very grounded and has bags of integrity.

Who would you have on your list and what would their qualities be?

Good wishes
Neil

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Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

In life you either get what you want or you get experiences of failing to have what you want. Life is that simple.

Why is that?

When we say we want something and then don’t do what needs to be done, our behaviour isn’t supporting our intention.

Interestingly our behaviour will always align to what we most want or to our fears about what we most want. What do I mean?

What I mean is when we really want something, our behaviour will align to it or to our anxieties about making the transformation.

So some people may currently have a contradiction between what they say they want and what they do to get it.

When we decide what we want, we create a resonance. That resonance can still include resistance or fear. Only when the resistance or fear is overcome we can achieve what we most want.

And it’s no different to where any of us are now. We have a choice to make our life or the world a better place by taking the steps to do that or to accept the status quo.

What makes the change is gentle action… loving action… spirited action… that keeps us on purpose and helps us be all we can be. And that doesn’t mean ignoring a fear, it means understanding it… accepting it… and working with it.

Fear doesn’t have to stop you. It can propel you!

We resonate with what we want when we make accepting second best a thing of the past. We resonate with what we want when we stop making excuses. We resonate with what we want if we accept our responsibility for everything we do and everything we are.

Contrast that with accepting second best… making excuses… not accepting responsibility… there is immediately a different resonance isn’t there?

Can you feel it?

If you are not currently getting what you want, look at where you accept second best, where you make excuses and where you might not be taking responsibility.

Lots of love and good wishes
Neil

Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

We all have things we want to make a little better.

We all have challenges…

The challenges might come in relationships, at work, with our kids, with our health or something else. So there is always something we want to make a little better.

The first thing to do is the step so many miss. And yet this step really isn’t that profound. In fact it’s simple. It’s profoundly simple. So let me share what it is…

The first thing we have to do to is to make a decision to change things.

I “made” a decision to make my life better in 2002. And it doesn’t matter how good or bad life is, if you want something you don’t yet have, you have to make a decision. If you don’t, nothing changes.

There will be some people reading this article today, who have made a commitment to live life to the full and who will not turn back. These are people who will make a note and who will never look near them and there are people who are ready to make life different – however big or small the change.

In 2002 I was signed off work with a back injury, broke, obese and at this time 33 years old with two kids, and single again after 5 years of abuse. So I couldn’t really go anywhere or do anything much and… to be honest… even if I could… I’d probably have been so depressed no one would have hung out with me for long.

That left me with one focus. That focus was on what would make life better. Nothing else mattered for me at that point and there has been one question that has made a massive difference to me.

The question I ask is, “What is even better than this?”

To ask this question it doesn’t matter how good or bad life is. Asking this question can always make things just a little better.

One afternoon, after a satisfying day, I was laying on the sofa, grinning at the ceiling and I asked, what would make this even better, so I called Jo in for a hug, because sharing my good mood was better than keeping it to myself and it made the moment a bit more special.

Give the question a try…

Best wishes
Neil

http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

As you probably know by now, we’ve been helping people – people just like you and me – to live life with purpose, passion and spirit at work and in everyday life for around five years.

The word community means “coming into unity” and CommunitySoul was inspired by a vision of people coming into unity with your soul… expanding, gently growing, being all you can be… loving life… engaging with the adventure of life.

For a long time I’ve been aware that anger, frustration, pain, fear and the like are just pointers – reminders that we have become disconnected from what’s  most important in life.

I’ve had my fair share of the painful side of life and used it time and again to resolve what’s happening. I’ve also taught others how to do this and have seen their lives changed beyond belief in a short space of time.

It’s using the pain points in life that have helped me create a life I love. I’m living in a place that’s at the base of the Mendip hills in the south west of the UK. I’ve got horse paddocks behind me and hills all around, and in the distance I have what an estate agent would call sea glimpses.

Jo and I got married just over a year ago and and for that I took 6 weeks off. And that’s not something everyone can do.

I have two kids, with who I have great relationships, and I’m one of the blessed parents whose kids tell them what a great dad I am (and it’s not always preceding a request for money or a lift!).

I’m engaged in work that  I  adore and find inspiring, serving people who want to become more… and I love that as human beings we can always expand a little more.

I’m not ever-so wealthy, but I am debt-less, and I could take six months off work without worrying and it feels good to have that kind of security.

And I’m sharing this with you because…

I want you to know that whatever setbacks you have, whatever you go through, you can build the life you want to live, from whatever starting point you are at right now.

When you are unhappy with something, it’s evidence that something needs to change. And you are the one who has to… and who can… change it.

Best wishes
Neil

http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

“Ignorance is the night of the mind, a night without moon or star.” Confucius

Living on the outer edge of my comfort zone has helped me explore the mystery of life a little and I’d like to share some of the experience with you in the hope it provides an added source of inspiration to you.

Do you like to have a plan for the day?

When I used to wake up in the morning I wanted to feel certain about the day. I wanted to know where I had to be, how I would get there, how much everything cost, how much money I’d earn, even what I’d eat. I guess it was little wonder then that almost everyday began to follow a pattern, right down to turning off the TV news at bedtime.

After an horrific head injury in 1995 followed by a divorce, I came to understand that life had an impermanent quality and for several years I rebelled against much of the structure and certainties I’d previously created to feel secure.

It was then that I fell in step with a ‘What’s meant to be, will be’, philosophy.

After drifting for a time I began to wrestle with myself. My home was a mess, my car was in a state, my shoes had holes in them, my hair looked like the birds had been having an all night orgy in it. I was so overweight that my clothes were such a bad fit I looked like a sausage about to burst the skin!

In Honest Reflection…

My life reflected a lack of respect and gratitude for the comforts afforded to someone living within one of the most privileged cultures in the world. And here I was; not caring for my body – the vehicle gifted to me for my journey through this lifetime – and not keeping my home space a clutter-less void that left room for the magic of life, instead it was filled with the old and the battered.

But guess what I did?

Each day I made demands on the world, for more – more money, a better life, for unbounded success and love.

In my first novel Black Water, a Place of No Hope, the two main characters, a soldier and a missionary, are in the worst place on earth – a prison pen, held by terrorists, in a jungle full of cannibals on an island surrounded by sharks (and, before you ask, this place really does exist outside of my imagination). While the soldier is searching for an escape, the missionary is meditating, content she has all she needs in the world. The soldier finds her lack of attention on how to escape annoying and confronts her.

Yet she is focussed on the simplicities of life that are all too easily forgotten…

The missionary’s responds to him. She says she cannot ask God for more until she has honoured what she already has – in this case, air, water, sunlight and a few moments of peace from her captors.

From the small beginnings of honouring the simplicities of life, I have, a step at a time, learned to ‘return the favour’ for all I have, just by appreciating what I now have.

In reply for my gratitude I’ve been shown the world in greater wonder and realised I’ve been living an adventure.

When opportunity is put in my path – and sometimes this is quite scary – it somehow takes me to the edge of my comfort zone then flicks out a helping hand. If I want to hold my breath, take the hand and go with it, usually I’m blown away by what follows.

Life with a sort of plan…

These days when I wake up, I may have a few appointments or some work to get done, but I neither wake up to a regimented life or a ‘whatever will be’ attitude. These days I’ve found the balance – what “Might be and what is”.

Best wishes
Neil

http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

Andrea was 33 years old.

In 16 years she changed jobs nine times. She had two relationship break-ups during that time and was just starting to notice cracks in her third relationship.

She tried getting married once. She even had a baby. She had a nice home. She had a lovely car. She often went out for meals. She watched all the soaps on TV and even went on nice holidays.

But something was still missing…

She often woke up feeling empty. She sometimes felt that the day ahead had no meaning. She would often go for a long bath to try to get to the bottom of why her life felt like it had this void.

She wanted her life to have meaning and purpose…

And what about Tim…

Tim had stuck with the same company for more than a decade, working in a call centre for a bank. He’d been promoted a couple of times. He was married, semi-happy, but often arguing with his wife for no good reason and he felt a growing restlessness.
For almost 8 years, he had felt like life was passing him by. He described his life as a rut and at aged and 35, he knew it was time for life to change before it passed him by.

There are some things we all know…

We all know what we do for a living…

We know our exercise routine, hobbies, habits, things that list of things that needs our attention and even our behaviours.
These are the things that we “do” to try to give our life meaning and purpose.

But are they “who” we are?

Doing  is ‘man’s’ reality…

Doing a job in order to be comfortable in a chosen lifestyle…

Doing well at school so you can be told you are good and go on to University and then earns lots of money…

Doing in accordance with religious beliefs so you can be-long to a group of people..

Doing like your friends and peers so you can be accepted.

Doing so your spouse will be happy with you and continue to love you…

But there’s another reality and it seems to be the reality most people are really searching for…

This is the reality of being. If the words about the do always come before the be.

Below I’ve changed that round and it makes a subtle difference that makes a big difference.

We can Be a certain person or certain way so the job flows with comfort and ease…

Being conscientious so you do well in school; being your spiritual truth so you may do whatever action is of your highest; being who you really are and doing what we know benefits the world and the people who live in it.

We can choose to do our job tomorrow and do the gardening at the weekend or we can be at work during the day and be in the garden on our days off. The difference is subtle, but the change in our reality – in the way we perceive the world – is profound.

Here are a few things about being that I’ve observed:

• ‘Being’ sounds that bit more gentle, distinctively more pleasurable and a lot less like hard work than “doing”.

• Being is about living knowing we have the world inside ourselves and knowing we have the power to create what we want or destroy what we have

• Being is about allowing yourself to become an expression in the world rather than forcing a way

• Being recognises that we are responsible for creating everything in our world and changing what we don’t like

• Being allows us to co-create with God/Universe/Tao/(or what you like to call the greater force that joins everything together)

• Being allows us to exit from painful vicious circles and find solutions

By “being” first – taking the time to think, act and observe – we get the initial sense that life is slowing down. Yet when we look in more detail we see the most rapid movement of incidents and events all leading up to in the moment experiences. Access the information that comes in those in the moment experiences leads us to more desirable outcomes and a life more on purpose.

You can read more on discovering life purpose here:  http://www.communitysoul.co.uk/lifepurpose.htm

Good wishes
Neil

http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

It was 8.45am, on a spring morning during the school run, when I discovered a philosophy that’s served me well ever since. It came courtesy of a conflict between a lorry driver and someone running late for work.

At that time in my life, I was getting things back on track after 6 years of getting things ‘wrong’ and, as I was walking home, I caught one of those perfect, transformative moments.

In life, we create history in every moment. Imagine that right now you’re printing your beliefs, values, understanding, hopes and fears onto a tapestry. And also imagine that what you think and feel about all of those things will create the next moment you live and how you live it.

Point in case….

As the lorry driver turned into a depot in a narrow, village street that was a cut through for rush hour commuters, a car driver got out of his car and began to give the lorry driver a piece of his mind as he reversed his forty tonne vehicle.

It was as the swearing and gesturing mounted that I realised how good my life was. I wasn’t uptight about being late for work. I wasn’t sitting in traffic getting angry. I had no stress in my life.

I worked for myself. I loved what I did and I gained a new appreciation for the pace my life was moving at.

So as the beefy lorry driver gestured from his cab, I walked on, smiling.

That’s when I noted I had no tension. I liked this feeling, and as the months went by, I began to make ‘Dropping tension’ a practice, whenever I felt it in my body.

Back then I didn’t know how I was changing my future when I dropped the tension. I just knew I felt better – more at peace.

During this time I was learning something.

What I began to understand was that you can’t beat the world into the shape you want it to be. Logically, the world is too big for that. So here is what happened…

I began to see that I was at my best when I didn’t feel tense. I made better decisions. I was kinder to myself and others. I began to enjoy the feeling of peace that flowed through me and I wanted more of that feeling.

So my life went on: feel tense, let go; find peace and love, be at my best; feel tense, let it go, and so on…

Then I began to pause at set times of the day to check in with how I felt. I’d find myself in the middle of something and say “breathe”, or “relax” and suddenly I’d find that feeling I was looking for.

My practice taught me that you can’t rush nature. But it also taught me something else – something more profound!

As I became more peaceful I became more in love with life. When this happened the things I’d been struggling to make happen, began to unfold.

What did this tell me?

It told me that and the quickest way to gain what I wanted was to become calmer, more peaceful, more loving.

We can all make our demands in life, like the man who got out of his car and berated the lorry driver. But when we do that, life – like the lorry driver – will gesture back at us.

If we get angry we’ll create a historical path of anger and that anger will ripple out and find more anger and more reasons to be angry and our future will become a reflection of this anger.

Yet if we catch our temper before it snaps in the traffic, or at the kids, or at a customer or bank clerk or at the insurance company, and if we can learn to drop the tension, we create a happier path and a ripple that changes everything we come into contact with.

With good wishes
Neil

Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

What’s the dream you’re working on right now?

You may know the answer to this straight away, but if you pause for more than 3 seconds to gather loose strands of thoughts about things you thought about days or weeks ago, you’re going to find this article the catalyst to moving the goal posts to a time, sometime sooner.

The first component is focus. You have to know clearly what you want long term. That long-term focus might break down into smaller steps.

Let’s say the long term focus is a great relationship that has thus far been illusive. That then might break down into daily tasks.

Each day I look at my 5 points of focus and decide what one thing I’m going to do on each of them. This means each day I move a step closer to my goal.

In the relationship example maybe the short-term goal is to do some self-work, book on a workshop, uncover what your ideal mate will be into, become a better kisser, dress better, feel better about yourself – whatever you feel is appropriate.

Once you have the clarity, the second thing to look at is your desire to make it happen. You’ve got to want it. It’s all fine and dandy thinking you’d like something, but do you really have a desire to have it happen. There’s little point in deciding you want something, then getting passive about it.

If the desire is there, then the third thing to look at is belief. You’ve got to believe you can do it. I believe I’m capable of pretty much anything I turn my mind to. I believe that when I come from a place of playfulness and fun, I double my chances.

Fourth element to consider is self-acceptance. Do you believe you’re worthy of what you want? To pull it off you have to believe this down to your core.

Be… do… have…

With clarity, desire, belief and self-acceptance in place, it’s easier to begin to “be” what you want – to act as if.

For example, if you want to earn £250,000 next year and you work that out, based on the hours you’d work during the next 12 months as roughly earning £200 per hour, you’d be clear on what you want.

When you look at why you want it, you build the desire. When you look for examples of where you are close to that value each hour, you build the belief. When you look at why you’re deserving of your goal, you build the references around you.

So when you begin to “do”, you’ll discover more evidence of when you’re earning your hourly rate. You may also notice when you’re not. When you start to move to lower then £200 an hour tasks from your way, you begin to get ever closer to the amount you want to earn.

When your focus, attention and behaviour have been honed long enough on what you want, your dream will come true.

Until next time

Neil

http://www.communitysoul.co.uk