They say Bill has a £40 million fortune.

As he sat in front of me he said, “Habits. Daily habits, that’s the key.”

Key to Success: Do what you know needs to be done until you succeed.

It’s widely stated that a key to success in any endeavour is the ability to “do what you know needs to be done until you succeed”. The trick is staying focused enough to do them.

Course, not everyone wants £40 million, but we all have something we’d like, be it a physical object or a way we’d like to be.

And everyone leads a busy life these days. Our work life is busier and more pressured than ever before. We have a host of personal projects and things to fix and do in our leisure time. There’s also a multitude of distractions: mobile phones, email, TV and family and friends to help out, to name a few.

Working with a single purpose is the ability to deal with one thing at a time and give it 100%.

When our mind is fragmented it’s hard to focus and get things done. When I write newsletters like this, I close out everything else. I close the room door, (sometimes the curtains), put on music that supports the mood of the message. I pop on the headphones, close down my email and completely immerse myself in the writing.

I know I can’t give work 100% on a Sunday morning at home. First, I want to be with the family. Second I feel immense guilt if I have to. Third, I know my attention is wanted and needed elsewhere.

If I even think about work on a Sunday morning I have 3 other desires and feelings immediately clogging me up emotionally and mentally. I know can’t give it 100%.

And working weekends isn’t in my plans either. So, there’s no point even thinking about it now.

Similarly, I know I can’t focus on a speaking project if my in-box is open and pinging with incoming email. I also can’t sleep if there is an important letter I need to write and I run it through my mind at midnight. I have to make notes, so I can give 100% to sleep.

When I start a day with a clear intention, I am more satisfied and the day goes better. Plus at the end of the day I feel I’ve accomplished something.

I always allow time when it’s done to enjoy the feeling of satisfaction, before anything else happens. Self-appreciation is healthy, especially when, once you’ve done something, you notice how much more “head-space” you have now that task isn’t gnawing away at you.

Best wishes
Neil

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Trying to Get on Track & Stay on Track? I can help.

Visit my website: http://communitysoul.co.uk/

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And while you’re here, leave a comment below and share your thoughts on this blog.

Do you remember the moment in the movie The Secret where the boy had been visualising having a new bike. And then the door miraculously swings open and there it is, all shining and new.

And he manifested this!

Now there are those amongst us – parents – who might teach our children some, let’s call it  “mental preparation”. And like me, you may also suggest to your kids to stop wishing and get off their butts and “Get a paper round” -  or something similar – because that practical action earns the money.

In personal development and in spirituality we are encouraged to meditate, even chant the sound of creation; visualise money coming, shout out an affirmation and “Act as if,” but if the fivers, tenners and twenties are not flowing to your door, what do you do next?

Simple fact is, money knows no reason not to flow to your door. It doesn’t know or probably care if your view to money is spiritual or not. It doesn’t know if you have a zillion degrees and A’levels, what car daddy drives, what accent you speak with, or what you’ll do with money when you get it.

One argument is that money is dumb. It just doesn’t have a clue. It doesn’t know if it’s in your purse or my wallet, and it doesn’t care!

Another argument is that money is infinitely intelligent. Perhaps it would prefer to be with people who respect it, nurture it, look after it and are wise with it. Or…

Maybe money just is! And if this is true then we need to understand this…

If you don’t have enough money, it is not the fault of money.

Sometimes, as we would teach our children, we just need to get up, snuff out the candle and take some good old-fashioned action. Here’s an example of what happened to me…

Some years ago, during a period of intense visualising, affirming and acting as if (or so I thought) a wonderful experience happened. In the space of one afternoon I had three money making opportunities: A request to consult on a project, a request to advertise on my web site and a request for coaching from a new client.

Guess what I did?

I chose to handle the requests later!

So I’m asking for more. And more is coming to me. But I’m pushing it away through my actions.

I caught myself doing this and what I saw was a fundamental difference in attitude from the days when I succeeded with money and the days when I failed.

In the good old days, when money flowed to me, my priority was to ensure my prospective customer got the most immediate service possible. In my days of failure, the opposite became true.

And what did money do?

Money goes to the most available outlet. If we bung up the inlet valve, we send a message to money that we’re not ready to handle it. It will therefore find somewhere else to flow. It doesn’t distinguish anything else other than not you, not now.

If we make it easy for money to flow to us, by returning a call, providing the information the customer needs and closing the sale clearly and emphatically, money flows, no more questions asked.

Something to think about:
• See where you disallow money or push it away.
• See where you feel unworthy
• See when you put off allowing money come to you

Good wishes
Neil

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Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

What are your thoughts on this blog? Would love for you to leave a comment.

Are you connected with your world?

Are you fully engaged with life?

It’s true. Many of us aren’t as fully engaged in life as we would wish.

Many live begrudgingly…

It’s easy to pinch a bit off here and there from life – taking the kids to school and dashing out the playground to work; getting stuck in traffic and cursing; trying not to share too many lunch breaks with colleagues; shutting ourselves away for nights on end to watch TV.

We separate ourselves from people. We see ourselves as separate to events.

Many blame outside forces… a government, a council, the banks, a colleague and often say: why is this happening to me?!

And it’s not happening to you… It’s happening with you… It’s happening for your benefit.

And you and “it” are one…

We are not separate from everything that’s happening. When we accept this… we recollect the control of our life from outside and bring it back inside.

When we accept the control of our lives we can accept that everything is happening ‘with us,’ is happen for us. We will see no separation between us and the never ending stream of events occurring in our life for our benefit.

It seemed odd to me that one day, out of the blue, two friends I’d not seen for months visited unexpectedly. Yet it happened for my benefit, because it helped me define qualities I wanted to give in friendships – generosity and spontaneity.

I hurt my neck and, while this could have been a bad thing, it made me think about life and where I may be a pain in the neck or who might be a pain in my neck.

If we slow life down a bit… if we engage more fully… we can notice the events stacking up to aid us in the moment towards a better, more fulfilling life.

Stop and notice.

With Loadsa Good Wishes
Neil

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Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

I’d like to hear from you – leave a comment below.

I know many people who would probably argue that success is meant to be easy. Many believe all we have to do is visualise our goal as already achieved, or chant a mantra, and it will all miraculously drop into our laps. And of course for some this does happen.

But we are all different. We all have different belief mechanisms. We all have different paths. And we are all here to experience the physical realities of what we feel about what we create in each moment.

It’s probably fair to say the physical and spiritual realities combine. We decide what we want and begin to work towards it (physical). We then have feelings about what we create (spiritual). This causes us to refine our actions until we either give up or succeed.

A few years ago, I found myself before a judge, giving evidence against someone I used to love. I had been abused by this woman and there were allegations that the same was happening to my daughter. There had been masses of paperwork in the ten months leading up to a final hearing (physical) and the issues raised made me question my own lack of guts in the past and the whole concept of love. My spiritual challenge during these months was to show love and compassion for my ex partner while doing what I had to do for my daughter – and of course answering my own failings as a human being before a Court.

I also took on different challenge. I decided to lose some excess weight. Having declared my intention the universe tested me, both physically and spiritually. During this time, and with a coach to reflect my behaviour, I learned more about my mind, body and spirit than I bargained for. I’ve since been blessed with the opportunity to coach others on the journey to better health and wellness.

Why do I mention these episodes?

In both cases I could have given up, lacked the relentlessness, lacked the guts, determination and backbone to nurture the skills I needed. Had I done this, through my failure to take action I’d probably have resigned one person to abuse for the rest of her childhood. In the other I’d have denied a great coach the ability to show off his skills and earn his living. And maybe, just maybe, as a result of all I’ve learned I might now go on to inspire something special to come from within others I come into contact with.

What if you contributed to one persons happiness today? What if you also inspired someone too because you found the skills and the relentlessness to go beyond the point most people do? What would your family be like in ten years? What would your friends become? What about your business? What about your village or your town?

You see, we can change the world and we do it through evolving our own consciousness. What skills do you have to find and when will you begin to apply them relentlessly in order to make your ripple of change in the world?

Much love and good wishes to you. I hope 2011 is your most magnificent year yet!

Neil

Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

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Would love to have you answer these questions: Have you contributed to one person’s happiness recently? Do you think this inspired someone else to do the same and go beyond the point most people do?

“Resolve to make at least one person happy every day, and then in ten years you may have made three thousand, six hundred and fifty persons happy, or brightened a small town by your contribution to the fund of general enjoyment.” Sydney Smith

What's your ripple? Have you tried to move away from the same old patterns and find fresh new ones?

New Year is traditionally an opportunity for a fresh start, but all too often, within days, we’ve slipped back into the same old ways as the previous year.

If things didn’t turn out in the way we hoped during the last year, then perhaps returning to the same old patterns and principals and accepting the world as it is, is not our most inspired idea. I think intellectually we understand this, which is why we make New Year resolutions and declarations of change at various points throughout the year.

If Edison hadn’t continually made changes to his experiments, I might not be writing this article with a light bulb shining over my desk. Like Edison’s experiments, it may be part of our grand design: to experiment, acknowledge the results, what they mean to us and then modify what we tried. Therefore each time we try, we move closer to the experiences we most desire.

I wonder if our resolutions are an opportunity – a golden nugget – to get to know our inner self. When we make the resolution to give up smoking, to lose weight, get fit, get rich or find love, we are resolving to find something of real value about ourselves.

Whenever we declare a change the Universe responds to us. It asks us through our in-the-moment experiences: Do you have what it takes? Are you determined? Will you work hard enough? Will you stick at it? Do you have the backbone? Guts? Relentless focus? Do you love it?

Following our resolutions we may discover a few things. Maybe we are lazier or have less willpower than we thought. Perhaps we beat ourselves up too much, get depressed, fail to understand others, or play out a victim role.

Remember: It’s the journey that counts – not the goal!

How are your resolutions going?

Best Wishes
Neil

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Have you made any resolutions this new year? If not, why not? If so, have you followed through. Would love to hear from you, so feel free to add a comment.

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Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

Free-will is important to us all. Wars have been fought for it and we’d fight them again if we realised someone was trying to take our free will away from us. But have you considered that your free- will is being eroded in such a subtle way that, before you know it, you’ve lost it?

Our will-power is best considered when looking at what we eat. Eating well is vital to our well being – you don’t have to be Einstein to know that. Yet many of us have given little consideration to what we put in our mouths, other than to think about the explosion of flavour.

I’m going to go on here and talk about food, but you could just as easily substitute what I say about food to what happens with your TV set, your cigarette smoking, drinking, newspapers and the negative stories and the business of life and do-do-doing.

For around the first twenty-two years of my life I ate what my mother cooked for me.  Beyond that I ate what my wife cooked for me, plus what the advertisers told me was good for me. By the time I reached the age of twenty-five I was eighty pounds overweight. By the time I reached thirty, I’d ballooned by another seventy pounds.

Looking at the statistics of obesity, I’d say my experience is quite typical. It all happens because we fail to take responsibility for what goes into our mouths and because advertisers know how to get us in a buying trance where we ignore everything else except the feeling of their product in our stomach. This failure to take responsibility is what determines that we live our lives according to someone else’s will.

Is it any different in other areas of life: sitting mesmerised, channel hopping – nothing’s on but you can’t turn it off; you know smoking is bad for you, but it makes you feel a little happier with life; the news is disheartening, but you read it anyway, with a morbid hope that by somehow reading it, everything will get better.

And what can you do when TV advertisers make pizza look mouth-watering, chocolate look sexy, they tell us milk has calcium that’s good for our bones and that wine is good for the heart. And we believe what they tell us… usually without question.

Why?

Over a year we’re bombarded with this image or that. They come via our TV, on billboards, in magazines, via the Internet. It is little wonder that if we don’t have a strong will and line drawn in the sand, that we will eventually succumb to the power of the advertiser.

When we think of their product, we remember how delicious it looked. When we taste it, we know it will taste fantastic – because the advertiser told us it would – when we smell it we remember it for next time.

And we then get bombarded with more adverts telling us this or that is for us. Our will weakens and once again we succumb to the advertiser.

It’s little wonder the nation is gaining weight, under stress, fed up and feeling like identity with our selves has been lost.  It’s like we’re in a trance drifting along a pavement, remembering the tasty images we’ve seen on TV; remembering the feeling in our mouth; remembering the experience of eating; remembering the smelling the bread or the coffee as the waft of crispy chicken wings drifts along the high street as a call to you, to stop in, fill up and feel good.

It’s like we can’t help but smoke, or drink, or work because we know we’ll get sacked if we don’t.

But do the processed foods that look good on TV and taste sensational in our mouths sustain us? Do our habits or addictions or our lifestyle make us feel good day-to-day. Are we functioning at maximum output or left with the sense that there must be more to life.

Reclaim your free-will. Don’t just eat things because you have always eaten them or because the TV says you should -  don’t trust anyone who has a vested interest in the product. If they are advertising the product, they’re making money on it and might not have given your overall health much thought.

And why should they?

A food manufacturing company makes food. It’s your responsibility to choose if you want to eat it or not. If you want to feel great and look good then choose the food that goes with that. If you want to feel sluggish and enjoy having rolls of fat hanging over your belt then buy the food that goes with that. It’s your right to have bad breath and have smelly clothes as much as your right to have perfect health; it’s your right to do what you’re told at work as it is to have respect for your personal life.

How do you make these informed choices?

Remember every decision you make is like putting fuel inside you. It ignites your passion or douses the fire. You wouldn’t put diesel in your unleaded fuel tank would you? Don’t risk putting fuel in your engine that might cause you to lose power. Reclaiming your will power put the right fuel in your tank, every time.

Best Wishes
Neil
What do you think? Do you have control of your willpower and free will? Would love to hear your thoughts, so feel free to leave a comment.

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Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

Has your mind taken over your spirit?

For most of us, we are driven by what seems to be our needs – emotions and wants. Those needs and wants are driven largely by what we perceive success to be. These perception are created by our masters…

Masters?

Yes, masters. I’m talking about the masters who taught and still teach us how to think and behave. I’m talking about our parents, teachers and peers. I’m also talking about the media, advertisers and clever marketers. Together they make us formidable machines that are driven by unconscious minds.

We literally become machines that will behave in an almost pre-programmed manner, irrespective of whether the current situation warrants the usual behaviour. Some of these masters condition us over time, others plant triggers in our heads, better know as subliminals.

It works like this:

In a relationship I act out the kind of behaviour I saw my parents act out.

In life, I act out the kind of metaphors my parents gave me – work hard for a living, money doesn’t grow on trees. I live these day-in, day-out.

When I sit down to watch TV, I like to sit down with food. If I forget, the advertisers remind me. Before I know it I’m in the kitchen hunting food, despite the fact I want to lose weight and have good dietary habits during the rest of the day.

The trick is to reverse the cycle – get the spirit to drive the mind. Here is how:

1. Sit down in a quiet place where you won’t be disturbed. Now ask your spirit where it would like you to go next on your life path.

2. When you have an answer, consider the possibilities of what needs to be done to get you on that path. Don’t get any fixed or rigid ideas.

3. Create a plan that you think might work and begin to probe and see if things work.

4. Monitor what happens. See where the plan works and see where it takes you and where it doesn’t.  Be aware at all times of when the mind kicks in and tries to take over, saying you ‘should do this‘ or ‘you should do that.’

Whenever the mind takes control you begin to run on auto-pilot. You have to become what they call in quantum physics, the observer.

How do I become the observer?

Simple. You have to learn to monitor your thoughts and begin to question them. By questioning them you become aware of them and can then choose which ones serve you and which ones don‘t. This is much more profitable than making the same mistake ten times and wondering why you keep getting the same result. The question here is always about who is in control…

Was the spirit driving the mind or was the mind driving the spirit?

Love and Good Wishes
Neil

Leave a comment and tell me what drives you — your mind or your spirit? Why?

Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

If we accept our comfort zone and never step out of it, we will never be all we can be. In this article I want to explore this, using children as the theme.

When you change what you do, the world around you changes.

I’m sure most of recognise that there is something we’d like – an experience or an opportunity that we haven’t had yet.

A number of people reading this article will want life to be be better in some way. They may want this change to happen but they may not be wandering around 24/7 trying to fix the problem.

But here is the truth. The problems most of us face are “back of mind” issues rather than “front of mind”. What this means is that we go from day-to-day coping, but never really healing the issues that gnaw away at our happiness.

Because these issues are back of mind, they are rarely noticed. They may be thought of every few week or months when the issue starts to cross a pain threshold.

For example, your teenager may be rude to you at 7.30am, but as the day moves on you might not think about that again until it happens again later. Then you wish it would be different, but then you forget about it again.

Years ago, when I was a stepparent to two children as well as a parent  to two of my own, I recognised the pains and stresses of blending two families together, especially when the kids were rude and disrespectful. Things didn’t work out in that relationship and when I left I had some issues to heal in my parenting.

I didn’t always like how my own children behaved and it would have been easy to blame them or try to change them, but I recognised that they were who they were because of who I was.

This is so because they reflected what I taught them about how they could be through my actions. So, it made sense when they did something I didn’t like, and I needed to change what I did that may have caused that to happen.

The result has been that the frustrations and pains, many parents have, just dissolved for me, one issue at a time.

It’s been nine years since I started practicing this and with one teenager and one tweenager, I’d have to go back almost 5 years to when I last felt stressed with my kids’ behaviour.

In fact, the other day I was saying how they have both become amazing people who I would readily choose as friends, because of the fine qualities they demonstrate.

So many parents feel exhausted, stressed and disrespected. Yet it doesn’t need to be that way. Just ponder what you have done that allows or causes them to be who they are. When you change what you do, the world around you changes.

Lossa love
Neil

What have you accomplished from ‘change’? Leave a comment!

Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

When you set a goal, that’s just the beginning.

What is it you need to do next to have your vision happen?

Decide on your goal - work out a plan - then move forward.

Way One – The Planning: Do you have to write a plan? Pick up the phone and ask someone for help? Find a mentor?  Is there a book you need to read? A website you need to go to? A product you need to buy? Help you need to enlist?

Make a list of all the steps and make a start. Then proceed.

But it’s not just what you need to do…

Way Two – Take note of the things that cause you discomfort or the things you usually leave undone. It’s madness that we do that kind of thing, but we do!

Why do we do it? We do it because we actually don’t like change much. And why would we? After all, we just spent our who life getting this way, so why would we want it to be any different?

For me, too often in the past I left details undone, so it tripped me up. I didn’t tidy up the little snags. For you, you might notice other things you do that trip you up.

These things that trip you up are things that cause a disconnect with a prospective client or customer, so you have to resolve these snags.

Way Three - When you notice you are doing something that stops you from achieving your goal, you find a solution.

There are other things that can stop you from getting the results you want.

Some people might know they need to make sales calls, but shy away from it. But remember, just because your business needs sales calls made, doesn’t mean you have to make them.

Like with all business problems (and life) you just need to find your way around the problem… over the problem or through the problem.

From there all you do is keep checking on what might stop you. Doing this closes the gap between what you want and where you are.

Happy results!
Neil

Leave a comment and tell us what you do to get results!

Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk

In life you either get what you want or you get experiences of failing to have what you want. Life is that simple.

Why is that?

When we say we want something and then don’t do what needs to be done, our behaviour isn’t supporting our intention.

Interestingly our behaviour will always align to what we most want or to our fears about what we most want. What do I mean?

What I mean is when we really want something, our behaviour will align to it or to our anxieties about making the transformation.

So some people may currently have a contradiction between what they say they want and what they do to get it.

When we decide what we want, we create a resonance. That resonance can still include resistance or fear. Only when the resistance or fear is overcome we can achieve what we most want.

And it’s no different to where any of us are now. We have a choice to make our life or the world a better place by taking the steps to do that or to accept the status quo.

What makes the change is gentle action… loving action… spirited action… that keeps us on purpose and helps us be all we can be. And that doesn’t mean ignoring a fear, it means understanding it… accepting it… and working with it.

Fear doesn’t have to stop you. It can propel you!

We resonate with what we want when we make accepting second best a thing of the past. We resonate with what we want when we stop making excuses. We resonate with what we want if we accept our responsibility for everything we do and everything we are.

Contrast that with accepting second best… making excuses… not accepting responsibility… there is immediately a different resonance isn’t there?

Can you feel it?

If you are not currently getting what you want, look at where you accept second best, where you make excuses and where you might not be taking responsibility.

Lots of love and good wishes
Neil

Neil Fellowes shows conscious entrepreneurs, coaches, consultants and complementary therapists how to make a difference AND a profit. Visit his website at http://www.communitysoul.co.uk